CYPRESS
Mudshovel
Fortunate Son
ABOUT
Cypress Foreman is a green cat who was forced to do violent crimes as a child by Piq Al Eni, and they had a friend named Rivers who they killed. They like to think they're better than everyone else because they listen to music made before they were born and know how to use a gun. It's a way to cope. It doesn't work.
Cypress is a green cat. Remember, we're talking about Cypress Foreman. They have wings. Yeah. I forgot to mention that they had wings in the previous paragraph. Sorry. They wear the hat that is hard to draw, baseball caps (sometimes), this weird thing on their neck (WTF is dat!?). They also often wield a magical umbrella. Personality.
During the school year, Cypress lives in a dorm at Terror University. Otherwise, they live in an apartment in Friendship City. Actually, they live in an apartment full time, because Cypress graduated in May 2024. They are friends with Mar. I don't know how, because he doesn't live anywhere near Cypress. That's it. I'm writing this later. I'm back. Mar actually is not too far away. But I still don't know how they met.
Cypress does not have a family. They do not know their biological mother nor father. Neither do I. Actually, I know his father. Not personally, but I know who he is. He is a bird. His last name is Wegxite.
They are a classy Friendship City journalist and investigator whose work more involves having disputes over billboards with The Futurists. They have Forress Weshell as their apprentice. Who is that?
They are an not an undergraduate student at Terror University and plan to graduate in May 2024 because they have graduated in May 2024 as of October 8, 2024. During breaks, they go back to their apartment in Friendship City. Wait. How TF do they get money? Oh right. Private investigation. Well, as it turns out, it is not enough money when there's the addition of their school tuition. That's why, despite being asexual, they do sex work at Hunky's Kink Beer. Could they have picked some other job?
Yes. But Cypress remembered that their late ex-best friend Rivers (the pink dog) made a lot of money from doing suck work. I mean such work. They plan to put an end to this practice after they graduate. Or pay off their student debt. Or something. This is a long ass paragraph. Dang. I'm probably gonna rip this in half or something. There, I just did. Wait. I already put half of this information in the Backstory area. Dang. Dang. Dang. Dang. Dang. Dang. Dang. I'll just remove it.
Despite not being feral, they sometimes say "meow" or "meow meow" after sentences. No one knows why they do this. It's probably because they are a cat. Well. They are at least half cat. This is because her father is a bird. I hope you remembered that.
Cypress is friends with Mar, Rocky, Snodie, and Blair. And Esther.
Cypress has an STD.
CURRENT DESIGN
GALLERY
By CoMo 11/23/24
By CoJu 11/23/24
By CoMo 09/21/24
By CoMo & CoJu 08/24/24
By CoMo 07/19/24
By CoJu 06/20/24
By CoJu 06/17/24
By CoJu 03/17/24
By CoJu 01/17/24
By CoJu 01/14/24
By CoJu 01/11/24
By CoMo 12/10/23
By CoJu 11/24/23
EXTENDED INFORMATION
As of 09/21/2024, Cypress is currently having a plush made of them.
BACKSTORY
Cypress was adopted by Piq at a young age. Specifically, they were adopted at the adoption center in Radia.
Cypress and Piq-Al-Eni did crimes together in Radia, CT. They were his pet, the little cat the police wouldn't dare investigate but they always had some form of drugs hidden in their fur. That's how they made a living off of Thwemmil trafficking. Anyway. Cypress made a friend, eventually. His name was Rivers, and he was a pink dog. He became Piq's other pet. Or child. Or [QJ]'s pet. QJ? Who is dat!? Wait. Let's start from the beginning.
Cypress was separated from their parents when they were a baby. Why? I don't know. Cypress' biological father is a bird - that is how Cypress got their wings. The bird is also the biological father of Nanika. The bird also used to beat Sepitina in her cage while she was still owned by [CoJu]. The bird is probably [CoJu]'s pet.
Cypress was adopted by Piq-Al-Eni in 2003. Or stolen. One of those. Nevertheless, he raised Cypress like they were his child. But they were actually his pet. Not his child. Anyways, while committing massive amounts of crime. What? Anyways, Piq was a real crime enjoyer, and this greatly influenced Cypress. They also became a crime enjoyer but only for the next 16 or so years. Witnessing illegal substance and organ trafficking and massive bloodshed became normal. Well, not really the latter. If a massacre happened in the small town of Radia every day, then the entire population would've been wiped out within a year. Then the United States would declare a state of emergency and Piq would have been on the top of the FBI's most wanted list. He But But he probably was.
During the summer of 2006, Cypress met Rivers at the park. Or the cafe.
They took their umbrella from Wyllisk Slasgay Uhwall, the king of northwest Connecticut. The umbrella is Wyllisk's right eye, and he wants it back.
In September 2019, Cypress enrolled into Terror University, a university in in the nearby city of Terror, CT. As Cypress became more involved in their study, they started to drift away from their life of crime. This slowly created tensions between them and Rivers. In September 2020, this escalated into a violent dispute between the two, leading to Cypress fatally shooting Rivers. After this, Cypress would change their major to Criminology. Is that a real major or did I just make that up? I hope it's real.
In Cypress' later university years, they were low on money. Cypress was struck by lightning in Terror University's field of eggs. After this, they decided to do sex work, because they remembered that Rivers got a lot of money from doing it. Yes. But Cypress remembered that their late ex-best friend Rivers (the pink dog) made a lot of money from doing suck work. I mean such work. They plan to put an end to this practice after they graduate. Or pay off their student debt. Or something.
Cypress graduated from Terror University on May 2024. I do not know their degree.
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT
2023
On November 22, CoMo and CoJu were playing a role-playing game, I mean, experience, sorry Roblox, on Roblox. CoJu decided to make a furry character. It decided to give them a plant related name, since the character was green. After utilizing the trusty search engine, CoJu looked at many plant related names on the internet of the world web. One of these names was "Cypress". CoMo then agreed to the name "Cypress" because, on the New York City subway, there are two stations with the word "Cypress".
On November 23, CoMo made a furry character in The Neighborhood to companion Cypress. This character would be Rivers Bedrock Wida-Es. Immediately after, CoMo decided that Rivers is dead because Cypress killed him. Which is correct. The destination of everything is death and destruction. War is inevitable. We are all just atoms on a rock with no impact on the grand scheme of the universe.
On December 10, CoMo tried drawing Cypress' umbrella but of course he drew it very incorrectly. He turned the drawing into a depiction of a giant with umbrellas for eyes and a mouth. The giant became Wyllisk Slasgay Uhwall. Now, where did that name come from? Wyllisk came from Wyllisk's Handbrakes, Slasgay came from... Erm... I forgot... Awkward... and Uhwall came from Owl, in reference to The Owl House.
2024On Twerk Day, CoMo and CoJu decided to make Cypress a sex worker. I forgot why.
On January 29, while writing a novel, CoMo and CoJu implied that Cypress' distaste in bloody crimes happened before their enrollment in Terror University. Earlier on the same day, CoMo established that Cypress ran away from Piq because, in addition to bloody crimes, Piq kept misgendering Cypress after they came out. Yet in another addition to this ever expanding list of so far three items of why Cypress ran away from Piq is that Piq had become an even crazier man in the nearly 20 years that Cypress had known him. Even more few days earlier, it was established that Ash Visage stole Piq's hat and that Piq tried chasing him afterwards. This was the distraction that Cypress needed to run away.
On January 30, I slightly modified the layout of this page. I am also canonizing a bunch of stuff. -CoMo. But you didn't need to know that. I haven't seen CoJu in ages.
On October 8, CoMo updated this page which hasn't been updated since June 20, 6 PM
On November 20, CoJu finally did something. CoJu changed Cypress's birthday from the 22nd to the 23rd.
2025
On the night of April 1, CoMo had a hilarious idea. What is Cypress' homophobic behavior came from a bad interaction with a homosexual? Carlos was a homosexual, and he was currently established to be friends with Cypress. What if they weren't friends anymore? What if, previously, they were more than friends? Yes, you heard that right. Cypress got an STD from Carlos. And what if, instead of saying that they had an STD, they just said they were asexual? What if they aren't actually asexual?
Of course, this idea contains several problematic things. First of all, this perpetuates the stereotype that homosexuals carry STDs. Second of all, if Cypress were faking their asexuality, then we would have no more asexual representation, which would be very devastating for the economy.
Nevertheless, as of April 2, the general idea of whatever happened in the first paragraph became canon, since CoJu thought it was hilarious. CoJu decided that Carlos still thinks he's friends with Cypress, while Cypress believes the opposite. This partly to be similar to Cypress' relation with Nolan.
Last updated 04/02/25